I pray all is well on your end because as of lately you’ve been driving me APE SHIT. Today, my emotions ran heavy as I woke up in a manic state preparing to conquer the world. As the day took a turn I could feel my energy shift and you shifting right along with it.
It was something like 3pm when you first reared your head into my productive day. The first trigger arose when discussing taking things at work personal. Normally, I would eat it up and be like who you talking to but this time I remained quiet as I processed my thoughts about the validity in the statement. I paid it because well…I’ll get to that later. Your second offense was later in the day during a meeting where I was forced to make what should have been easy choices but keeping my focused was difficult because you decided you needed to interject. Your 3rd and final strike was when having a heart to heart with a dear friend I became overcome with emotions and you stepped in to cause sweating and hyperventilating.
Today, you showed up and showed out. Thank you. I’d normally be exhausted and in my feelings about this time but nope. Not this time!!! You will not have the satisfaction of taking me over again. No longer will you have the agency to consume my mind, body, and soul for days or weeks at a time.
Making it through today was not child’s play and I even had to shed a few tears just to make it home. But you know what, I would rather shed 1 million tears to prevent you from gaining your control of me than to allow you to reign supreme in my life ever again. So bring it on. I know the God of my understanding watches over me and will be there to see me through those hard times.
Thank you for in your own way directing me to this moment of self reflection and taking strides towards CONTROL.
With love and appreciation,